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Performace Appraisals

 GREAT PRESENTATION SKILLS ........= Able to bullshit
 GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS ........= Spends lots of time on phone
 AVERAGE EMPLOYEE .................= Not too bright
 EXCEPTIONALLY WELL QUALIFIED .....= Made no major blunders yet
 WORK IS FIRST PRIORITY ...........= Too ugly to get a date
 ACTIVE SOCIALLY ..................= Drinks a lot
 FAMILY IS ACTIVE SOCIALLY ........= Spouse drinks, too
 INDEPENDENT WORKER ...............= Nobody knows what he/she does
 QUICK THINKING ...................= Offers plausible excuses
 CAREFUL THINKER ..................= Won't make a decision
 AGGRESSIVE .......................= Obnoxious
 USES LOGIC ON DIFFICULT JOBS .....= Gets someone else to do it
 EXPRESSES THEMSELVES WELL ........= Speaks English
 METICULOUS ATTENTION TO DETAIL ...= A nit picker
 HAS LEADERSHIP QUALITIES .........= Is tall or has a loud voice
 EXCEPTIONALLY GOOD JUDGEMENT .....= Lucky
 KEEN SENSE OF HUMOUR .............= Knows a lot of dirty jokes
 CAREER MINDED ....................= Back Stabber
 LOYAL ............................= Can't get a job anywhere else