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Top Ten Excuses For Not Doing Maths Homework
 I accidentally divided by zero and my paper burst into flames.
 Isaac Newton's birthday.
 I could only get arbitrarily close to my textbook. I
couldn't actually reach it.
 I have the proof, but there isn't room to write it in this margin.
 I was watching the World Series and got tied up trying to
prove that it converged.
 I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy.
 I locked the paper in my trunk but a fourdimensional dog got
in and ate it.
 I couldn't figure out whether i am the square of negative one
or i is the square root of negative one.
 I took time out to snack a doughnut and a cup of coffee. I
spent the rest of the night trying to figure which one to dunk.
 I could have sworn I put the homework inside a Klein bottle,
but this morning I couldn't find it.
