About me
Contact me
My research
Courses
Humour
Fencing
Quote for the Day
Home
You've come to Doug Aberdeen's old pages. In 5 seconds you will taken to my new pages http://sml.nicta.com.au/~daa/
OPERATION WHITE RABBIT
The LAPD, FBI and the CIA were all to prove that they were the best at apprehending criminals. The President decided to give them a test. He released a white rabbit into a forest and each of them had to catch it.The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all the plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations, they conclude that rabbits do not exist.
The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they bomb the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit. They make no apologies; the rabbit had it coming.
The LAPD go in. They come out after just two hours, with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling, "Okay, okay, I'm a rabbit, I'm a rabbit".
The Australian PM hears about this and decides to test Australian Law Enforcement Agencies. He releases a white rabbit into the forest just outside Canberra.
The Victorian Police go in. They return 15 minutes later with a koala, a kangaroo and a tree fern all shot to pieces. "They looked like dangerous rabbits we had to act in self defence" is their explanation.
The NSW Police go in. Surveillance tapes later reveal top ranking officers and rabbits dancing naked around a gum tree stoned out of their brains.
The QLD Police go in. Shortly afterwards, they come out driving a brand new Mercedes, scantily clad rabbits draped all over them. The QLD Premier congratulates them on maintaining traditional family values.
The WA police went into the forest and caught the white rabbit, but the rabbit inexplicably hung itself in the cell when the attending officer "slipped out momentarily" for a cup of coffee.
The NT and SA police join forces to belt the crap out of every rabbit in the forest except the white one. They know it is the black ones who cause all the trouble.
The NCA couldn't catch the rabbit, but promise if they are given a budget increase they can recover 90 million from the rabbit in unpaid taxes and proceeds of crime.
The AFP refuses to go. They examine the issues, particularly cost and decide that because of the low priority and high cost to the organisation as a whole, the matter should be rejected and returned to the referring department for investigation.
ASIO go to the wrong forest.
